Well it all started with a little bird. While visiting Shawn on the weekend, I discovered a nest right in one of the flower pots, surrounded by dahlias and petunias.
I was so honoured to have this feathery visitor to our garden, that I decided to roll up my sleeves and do a major garden makeover. As I weeded, pruned and mulched, I felt myself getting more and more tired. Not the normal tiredness that comes with a good honest day’s work, but the low energy, chills and sense of un-wellness which could only mean one thing: an infection. At some point in my gardening endeavors I must have pricked my skin on my lymph-node deficient left side, allowing infection to set in.
My plans for Friday evening involved sitting on my friend Kathy’s patio, having “just the one” glass of wine and enjoying the sunny weather……not sitting in a hospital waiting room for hours on end. On a brighter note however, as soon as I mentioned my history of cancer, I was fast tracked to the head of the long line! I was so pleased by this preferential treatment that I briefly considered resurrecting my 100 Perks and adding Perk 101: Fast tracked in the ER. In no time, I found myself on a stretcher, hooked up to I.V antibiotics and dodging dirty looks from the many patients who had been biding their time waiting to be seen by a doctor.
Surrounded by the familiar hospital smells, the sound of the I.V pump and the feel of the needle in my arm, I found myself experiencing “chemo flashback”. I was gripped with fear and a profound sadness, as I felt the hot tears bubble to the surface. “It is just not fair”, I thought, “I am done with cancer, why can’t I just move on with my life?” Followed by, “Cancer will always be there, I will never be free of it.” And if that was not enough to really wind me up for a good cry, I added, “Shawn may as well go and find himself a healthy woman.” I called my friend, Lil, intent on stepping the ole pity party up a notch, but to no avail. Rather than wallowing along with me, Lil said, “Oh stop your boo-hooing. Forget the chemo flashback and pretend you are shooting up heroin!”
So, I ended up spending the Canada Day weekend in the hospital, hooked up to i.v. antibiotics, pretending that I was shooting up heroin, so as to avoid another episode of the dreaded chemo flashback. And all because of that effing little bird.
(Doesn’t she look smug sitting on that lamp post?)