Perk # 75: Cancer Brought Out The Family Resemblance To My Son

Ever since the day Donovan was born, I’ve been hearing the same thing over and over again, “He looks JUST like his father.”  Lately, however, people are starting to notice my resemblance to my handsome son.  Maybe it’s the eyes?  Could it be the nose?  No, it is definitely the hair!

While not all chemo drugs cause hair loss, baldness is the universal tell tale sign that a woman has cancer.  Some women are quite comfortable with their lack of locks.  I met a brave woman at the cancer clinic last week who told me that the only time she covers her head is when it is cold outside.   If people stare at her in a rude way, she will say something like, “Excuse me, do I have a hair out of place?”  That takes courage.   For some women, on the other hand, losing their hair is more emotionally traumatic than losing a breast.

I fall somewhere in between those two extremes.  I can honestly say that I did not shed a tear when my hair fell out shortly after my first chemo session.  In fact, once it started coming out by the handful, I was like someone with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  As one woman put it, “It was like plucking a chicken.  Once I started, I couldn’t stop.”   While I’ve never had the pleasure of plucking an actual chicken, I did give literal meaning to the expression, “I feel like pulling my hair out!”

Although I was personally comfortable with my own baldness, I was not comfortable enough to bare it to the world.  Not until now.  And that is only because I have been told that I look JUST like Demi Moore from the movie G.I. Jane.  Well, I have been told that by myself, but if you stretch your imagination just a little you might pick up on the resemblance.  Is it the eyes?  The nose?  No, it is definitely the hair.

Tip: While being bald has its perks, it is a joyous day when new hair starts to grow in.  Be patient, it WILL grow back.


12 thoughts on “Perk # 75: Cancer Brought Out The Family Resemblance To My Son

  1. Every time I see a bald or headscarf-covered woman in public I give her a big smile and a thumbs up. I think we should also have a superhero cape to wear in public during our cancer battles!

  2. You know cuz it’s so wonderful how you mention that everyone takes their various body changes, that occur during cancer, differently. I recently met a lady up here in Alberta that’s also battleing breast cancer, and has of course from treatment lost her hair. We were at the bar celebrating my birthday and ran in to her. She looked wonderful. But throughout the night, as the bar filled up it got really warm. She whipped the wig of and went comando of a sorts for the rest of the night. It was wonderful, I thought she was so brave. And honestly I didn’t really notice if anyone was starring rudely. I think everyone must have seen what I saw, a beautiful, brave and amazing woman.

    • Thanks for sharing that story, April. I have loosened up a few times after a couple of glasses of wine and “let my hair down” by taking off the wig, but only with my friends. It takes a lot of courage to do that in public. BRAVO!

  3. Look at all the hair…..I can see how much Diggs looks like you now! Sooo funny! loves ya lots shissshyyyyyy!

  4. I have not really had a problem with no hair, but even before I lost my hair I was a ballcap kind of woman. Unfortunately now I have no hair under said ballcap I have been called “Sir” a few times so have had to change my head attire for now. Maybe going without headcover would be better or as Pinkunderbelly says, wear a cape!!

  5. OHMYGOSH! You look awesome! Your hair is coming in great and you are absolutely beaming. I love this picture of you and your son!

  6. Hi Florence,

    I finished chemo in September 2010 but unfortunately my hair has not come in yet and I am still wearing my wig in April 2012! Even my hair stylist is perplexed as what to do with IT, and I admit it does get to me at times. I’d be less than honest to say otherwise. Before breast cancer, I would frequent the salon every weekend to have my locks styled and a day after my surgery I walked into the salon, drainage tubes and all hidden under my clothing, to have my hair done – it was my guilty pleasure.

    My oncologist is sending me to a dermatologist to determine if anything can be done. It is my understanding that sometimes the anti-cancer meds can cause male-patterned baldness. I’ve tried FAST shampoo and am now giving Nioxin a try.

    I don’t know what I would have done without my natural hair wig all this time – I think I would have become a hermit. I visit the salon and my stylist shampoos and styles it just like my own hair was. In fact, my wig is so much like my own hair that even many of my own family members did not realize I was wearing one until I whipped it off in front of them one balmy summer day. Although I have showed the gals at my work my bald head, I don’t think I’d ever be able to go without my wig in public. It would take bottles of wine. The lady whom April mentioned is an extraordinary woman! Cheers to her!

    I found your card when I visited the Bliss Murphy Cancer Clinic a couple weeks ago! It’s great! I look forward to reading your posts.

    Linda 🙂

    • That does seem like a long time for your hair to grow back. Good idea to see a dermatologist. Please God you will find something to move the process along. Sounds like you have a great hair dresser! Glad you found my card. I have been leaving them around the cancer center. Take care!

  7. You are such an inspiration to other women suffering cancer. Your strength during this ordeal is just so amazing. Thanks for sharing with others and I pray that you have a quick recovery so that you can enjoy lots of new things in your life with your children.

  8. Thanks for stopping by my blog…we could be sister 🙂 You look fabulous! I was told I looked like Charlize Theron myself (she shaved her head last year) or Sigourney Weaver in one of the Alien movies! Either way, quite strong iconic women…I can live with that!

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